Nathan Epperson
The Beginning
It’s an early August evening and the sun is slowly beginning to set. I sit on 9-year old Nathan Epperson’s porch and watch him play tag with JaLiyah and Naima, two other children in the project. Nathan chases the girls and they squeal in delight as they try to escape his touch. I smile and breathe in the moment. Outside of the children’s laughter the block is quiet and still, not a soul in sight. Nathan’s block looks like an ordinary suburban street, one with manicured lawns, flower beds and family-sized vehicles. But here at Nathan’s home lives an extraordinary family. His yard, being one of the few with posters, includes signs supporting the Black Lives Matter and 8 Can’t Wait Movement. Nathan’s father, Geoff, has them deeply rooted in the ground so they’re unmovable. Geoff and I call Nathan to the porch and he runs up with his bottle of water. He sits down and for the first time I notice the writing on his neon green shirt, it says, Black Lives Matter, I Can’t Breathe. I think to myself, ‘How many 9-year olds are this socially conscious?’ As I fumble with my recording device, Nathan fumbles with his water bottle. His eyes are darting from the camera, to me, then to the ground. Geoff, noticing his son's anxiousness, soothingly says, “it’s not a quiz”. I chime in and reiterate that our interview is more so a conversation and that he has nothing to worry about. Looking more at ease, Nathan is ready to begin our session.
Nathan begins by sharing a conversation he had with his dad about protesting. “At first I thought protests were BAD...because there was riots going on. I thought protests had something to do with riots. But then my dad told me that protests WERE OKAY. And then I was like, ‘maybe we should do one’. And then my dad was like, ‘yes’. And from there he kept on asking people on Facebook (if) they wanted to join.” At Nathan’s request, Geoff began to organize a family-style protest that promoted peaceful demonstrations. I wondered how Nathan felt as the protest approached. After seeing uprisings on TV, was he concerned about the Orland Park demonstration? Did he worry about counter protesters or demonstrators becoming violent? He responded, “I wasn’t nervous (because) I KNEW there would be.” Nathan understood that the protest would bring out counter protesters. “You just can’t think about those people, you just keep moving on and just keep on doing your thing, you know? I just felt like we were doing the right thing.”
Doing the right thing has been instilled into Nathan to such an extent, that he has difficulty understanding racial discrimination. I ask, “Have you had conversations at home about race?” He replied, “Yeah. I was talking to my parents like, ‘this isn’t right’. I just don’t get why people can’t see…” Nathan pauses and looks away as he pulls his thoughts together. “I just don’t get why people see Black people like a different species. They’re JUST US! IT DOESN’T MATTER the color of your skin, it just matters the color of your heart.” Nathan shakes his head, takes a sip of water and continues. “I don’t know HOW people can think that Black people are like BAD, like they shouldn’t be accepted as humans, which I don’t get. They ARE humans...they might even be our FAMILY! I just don’t get it, you know?” Nathan now leaning forward stares deeply into my eyes as if he’s searching for an answer. I sit silently as his 9-year old words permeate the air. I’m processing Nathan’s truth while also thinking about our nation’s children. I imagine other children experiencing the same confusion and frustration.
I come out of thought and ask Nathan about his most memorable moment at the protest. “I’m not sure. All of them were, all of them were pretty good.” I invite him to share one with me. “Like, it’s not one, it’s like multiple times it’s happened. It just felt GOOD when you saw people CHEERING for you, saw people honking because they agree with you…” A collection of memories serve as Nathan’s memorable moments. Memories of family activism and supportive community members. Moments where hundreds of people are screaming, “Black Lives Matter and 8 Can’t Wait!”
We approach the end of our session and I ask Nathan, “When you hear the chant, Black Lives Matter, what does that mean to you?” “Well it means to me that changes should be made...it makes me feel like BLACK people aren’t accepted in this world and they should be. I just wish everyone just lived in peace…”
As I reflect on the children who have participated in this project, I think about their innocence. Each time they view a man begging the police for his life (George Floyd), hear of a woman being shot to death in her sleep by the police (Breoanna Taylor) and read about another child being gunned down by the police (Tamir Rice), these injustices murder the spirit of our children and steal away their innoncence. Can we one day become as little children and see how they see, and want what they want? A world where humanity is restored to all people and peace is the law of the land.
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